05 November, 2002

Snyder Lives On

High school football player is given a two-day, in-school suspension for kissing his girlfriend on the forehead. I think public displays of affection are pretty damn irritating, but this is taking things a bit too far:

Rodney Bowler, Union Grove principal, said kissing, hugging excessively and other physical contact distracts students from academics.

"We run a strong academic environment in which kissing is not an activity that needs to take place in the school building," he said.

Yeah, you never know. It might just lead to the sex!

This, however, is a bit of an overreaction on the student's part:

"It's been crazy. I don't want this to happen to somebody else," Maurice said Wednesday. "It hurt me so bad, my senior year missing my homecoming game. I'm going to be scarred for life. I'll have no stories to tell my kids."

On second thought, maybe it's not overreaction. Odds are, high school will pretty much be this kid's salad days. And fond memories of winning some football trophy or breaking some pointless record are all that he will have in 15 years, when he's getting drunk with his buddies after a long day of work at some factory in the middle of Ass Fuck, Georgia. Or shooting the shit with the other employees at Big Earl's Used Car Emporium.

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