13 March, 2003

Why Stop at the Fries?

As if replacing the word "french" with "freedom" wasn't enough, those wacky kids in Congress are at it again! What could be as important as freedom fries, you ask?

The economy?

No, silly! We need to exhume the bodies of the thousands of men and women who died during the World Wars, which are now rotting in the fetid soil known as France! With all those soldiers spinning in their graves, it might be hard to move the coffins.

But let's see what a bona fide veteran has to say about this:

Mack McConn, 78, of Orlando, who survived the D-Day landings at Normandy, during which more than 10,000 Americans were killed, was outraged at the suggestion of moving the bodies.

"That is ridiculous," the Navy veteran said. "I can tell you right now that I don't approve of it at all. We've had problems with the French before, but it's like a spat; you get over it. It would be ridiculous to open those graves."

Amen, sir. Amen.

Dear Florida: Please remove yourself from our country. Thanks!

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