30 October, 2003

Weird Sitings

Couple of the strange things I saw while walking around DC over the weekend:





Feel free to write a story for one of the pictures, and share it with the class in comments.

Guilty Until Proven Innocent

The t-shirt says it all.

23 October, 2003

More Gift List

While I'm asking for stuff, I'd also like this. Large or XL, please.

Or possibly this one.

22 October, 2003

I'll Be Dipped

Crappy shows get crappy ratings. Who would've thunk it?



"That is really disappointing," says a "bewildered" Stacey Lynn Koerner, analyst at media buyer Initiative. "I expected (Joe) would do well given all the promotion it got."


And I suspect Stacey was also bewildered as to why the sun did not rise in the west this morning.

Gift List

Won't somebody please make my life complete, and buy this for me?

Link via reenhead.com.

Hedgehog

The WB casts a second season of Surreal Life



Living together for the next two weeks while the show shoots will be former "CHiPs" star Erik Estrada, televangelism scandal figure Tammy Faye Messner, "Real World: Las Vegas" cast member Trishelle Cannatella, porn legend Ron "The Hedgehog" Jeremy, ex-"Baywatch" beach bunny Traci Bingham and Rob Van Winkle. You may know him as Vanilla Ice.


I'm almost at a loss for words. All I can say is that I will have to watch at least the first episode, to see how everyone interacts with The Hedgehog.

Poor Proofreading

Someone should really pay an editor to look over articles before they're published. Case in point, from "AG signs Wal-Mart tobacco sales deal":



At the time Attorney General Mike McGrath scrawled his signature at the bottom of the assurance of voluntary compliance, the signatures of 42 other attorneys general also appeared on the document.


Think about it. The paragraph makes it sound like the bottom part of the document was blank, up until McGrath signed his name. At which point, all of the other signature showed up, as if by magic. That's a pretty damn cool trick, if you ask me.

21 October, 2003

Spaghetti Plates?

Can somebody tell me why we're making it easier for the stupid people?

Strange Indeed

The 80s were certainly a strange time.

Warning: Not safe for work.

One Other Thing

While I'm on the subject of stupid shit: fuck this, as well.

Update: okay, two things.

Rich Girls

For some reason, MTV thinks that America wants to watch yet another reality show. As if subjecting us to the Osbournes and the many clones that have popped up since then hasn't been enough, now we can watch a show about Rich Girls.



Meet Ally Hilfiger and Jaime Gleicher: normal teenagers who enjoy doing normal teenage things like shopping, talking on the phone, and going to the prom. But there's one important difference between them and the rest of us--they're rich. Really, really, really rich. Get a first-hand look at their super-fabulous life when MTV follows two of the wealthiest teens on the planet to see how they spend their mountains of money.


Why, exactly, am I supposed to care one flying FUCK about a couple of snobby rich kids and how they spend their daddies' money? Fuck that and fuck them. Fuck you MTV, while we're at it.



I mean, what could be more fun than watching two kids drop a few thousand dollars in some trendy New York City establishment that was closed down, just for them, while a couple of blocks away, a homeless guy is slowly starving to death? God bless the American dream!

20 October, 2003

Ball-Jiggling Good Time

Just got back from seeing Lewis Black and Dave Attell at the Warner Theatre. And damn, I have not laughed that hard in such a long time. It was nice not to think about anything annoying me for two hours, and just let go with the ha-ha.

Dave Attell is one fucked up man. But funny. Oh so funny. He's saying what we're all thinking. Or at least, what I'm thinking. So that's pretty fucked up right there. And let me just say, after seeing his act, ferris wheel music just won't sound the same again.

19 October, 2003

Finding the Loopholes

How is the telemarketing industry dealing with the National Do-Not-Call List? Why, by finding ways around it. Or at least exploring new methods of selling.



Tampa-based Sykes Enterprises Inc., one of the largest calling companies, will try to entice people into calling it by working with direct mail and spam purveyors to bombard consumers with advertising that dangles free vacations and discount DVDs at the other end of a toll-free line, officials said.


Wow. Reminds me of the "old days" when we got catalogues delivered to our house on a regular basis. However, I'm sure this is different...and much more innovative.



Some large companies that use telemarketing extensively have begun experimenting with low-tech alternatives. SBC Communications Inc., for instance, has started in recent months to send salesmen door to door, according to spokesman Michael Coe.

The program, which is being conducted on a trial basis in Michigan, Texas, Ohio and Illinois, does telemarketing one better, he said, because "it really puts a face on the company." Coe said the program has been "well received."


Holy shit. This has got to be the most original idea I have ever heard! Why the hell didn't anyone think of doing this before? Sending salesmen door to door. Damn. Way to think outside of the box, SBC. I salute you.

16 October, 2003

Glorious iTunes

Apple has released iTunes 4.1, including a version for Windows! Hallelujah! I'm particularly happy because before, I was importing all of my music in AAC format on my Powerbook, and saving it to a shared drive on my Windows machine. Which meant that 1) things were slow when updating my iPod, since it had to go over ethernet and 2) I couldn't play the files on my Windows machine. At least this solves the second problem. The first will just have to be something I deal with, unless I decide to buy a firewire card for the PC. Ah well.

And speaking of updates, my little Windows Update service pops up this afternoon, informing me that I have five new security patches to apply to the system. Fine, fine, I think. Just do it so I don't have to worry. A few hours later, as I run iTunes for the first time, it informs me that I should really update my computer to Win2k, Service Pack 4. Huh, that's odd. Thought I did it.

Nope, still at SP3. Huh. You'd think Windows Update would've said something to me about that at some point? So I fire up the dreaded IE and run Windows Update from there. Sure enough, SP4 is on the list of critical patches. So why exactly am I running the update service, if it doesn't pick up a damn critical update?

And on top of that, there are four more updates, not critical, waiting for me. Once again, why have an automatic service that doesn't at least alert me to the existence of these files?

Doormat

They all said I was mad! They said I would never find one! Well, they were all wrong! Behold, my new doormat:



Doormat that says GO AWAY

10 October, 2003

08 October, 2003

Thinker

From the BBC's Thinker Quiz:



You are a Naturalist Thinker

Naturalist Thinkers:

  • Like to understand the natural world, and the living beings that inhabit it
  • have an aptitude for communicating with animals
  • You try to understand patterns of life and natural forces

Other Naturalist thinkers include:
Charles Darwin, Jane Goodall, Johnny Morris, David Attenborough

Careers which suit Naturalist thinkers include:
Biologist, Meteorologist, Forester, Farmer, Astronomer, Alternative therapist



Link via Nobody Knows Anything.

06 October, 2003

Lazy, Lazy People

I drive into work this morning, park my car, then walk across the street to the pseudo-supermarket to pick up my morning bagel. All perfectly normal things. As I'm walking, I see a car leaving our parking lot, and driving over to the supermarket's parking lot. Okay, that's a tad lazy, but maybe the driver was heading out after a nightshift, and just needed to pick up some milk on the way home.

As I head back to the office, bagel in hand, I see the same car, driving back to the office as well.

Literally, this is one block of walking to get from point A to point B. A little more if you don't cut across the grass. And yet this lazy sack of flesh had to drive the whole distance.

Is it any wonder our country is so fucked up?

04 October, 2003

Smoldering

Philip Morris pays damages to burned girl



Philip Morris USA has settled a lawsuit in the case of a toddler who was severely burned when a cigarette left in a car started a fire, the first time the nation's top cigarette maker has paid damages in a personal injury case.

...

Shannon was 21 months old at the time of the fire 11 years ago. She was asleep in her car seat when her mother got out for a quick stop at her grandparents' Fort Worth house and left a burning cigarette between the front seats. After about 10 minutes the car was in flames, searing her face, ears, torso and hands -- more than three-fourths of her small body.


How in the fuck is this the fault of Philip Morris? The mother left her damn lit cigarette between the front seats of the car. "Gee, you mean it might be a bad idea to leave a lit cigarette there? How about I just leave a lit match instead?"



MORON



Grisham said he sued Philip Morris in 1994 after investigators cited a cigarette as the cause of the blaze and after he learned that the Marlboro 100 and other cigarettes are designed to continue burning down to the filter even when someone is not inhaling.


Yeah, and?! It's called fire. This is what fire does. It keeps going. Please stop rewarding people for being stupid.

S-A-TUR-DAY Night!

Inebriated. Drinking a mocha. Reading Caesar: A Biography. All while in the nearby Cosi's. Do I know how to party or what?

And as much as I don't like the general mass of people, being drunk doesn't make them any more interesting.

02 October, 2003

Shark Bites

Family of Shark Bite Victim Sues County.



Amber Benningfield, who was 13 at the time, was attacked by a shark in New Smyrna Beach while she played in the surf. The shark bit her left calf and scratched her hand as she tried to escape. The Bowling Green, Ky., teenager was treated at a hospital and released.

According to the lawsuit filed Sept. 16, the county should have provided a warning "of the dangerous condition created by the sharks.'' The suit argues the county acted negligently and is responsible for Amber's permanent scarring, disability and disfigurement. The suit seeks unspecified damages of more than $15,000.


Hey, moron! They're sharks. They're dangerous. What did you think, they come up and nuzzle you like a kitten? I long for the days when people like this, with no common sense, were quickly weeded out of the gene pool.

01 October, 2003

Family Album

I've added another new theme: Old Tyme. It's now also the default theme, if you don't have one set. Created the logo from one of the many family pictures I've scanned in this week. Enjoy.

NETBIOS

Does anybody out there know if there is way to enable & disable NETBIOS over TCP/IP in Windows 2000, using the command prompt? Seeing as how it is one of the three things in Windows that does not require a system restart when you change it, I would figure there would be a command-line switch for it.

So far, the Oracle at Google has turned up nothing, so I'm thinking it won't be happening.