27 February, 2004

Retirement Claims Another Hollywood Great

Anderson: "I Have Retired"

Pamela Anderson has rubbished reports she's to star in a new action film - insisting she's serious about her retirement from showbiz. Fans were shocked when the former Baywatch actress was reported to be signed to appear in 'spiritual' movie No Rules, after telling interviewers "I'm never going to work again. I'm retired. I'm just being a mom" to her two children with ex- husband Tommy Lee, Brandon, seven, and Dylan, six. But she insists she really has retired. Anderson told American TV show E! News Live last night, "I don't want to be an actress. I never did want to be an actress. I have retired. I always said that when the kids started going to school, like kindergarten and first grade, which they are right now, that I wouldn't do a series or any more movies or anything like that. Since I've said I retired, I've had so many people come up to me about movies and things like that. I'm not interested in a TV show - that takes too much time." Despite her early retirement, Anderson is currently providing the voice for animated stripper Erotica Jones in American network Spike TV show Stripperella.

What luck, Pam. You never really were an actress!

25 February, 2004

The Joy of Sect

Pope smudges ashes on little boy

This so called "new religion" is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants designed to take away the money of fools. Let us say the Lord's prayer 40 times, but first let's pass the collection plate!
-- Reverend Lovejoy's church sermon, "The Joy of Sect"

It's Gotta Be Worse Somewhere Else

Young Turkmen face beard ban

Turkmenistan President Saparmurat Niyazov has passed a decree forbidding young men in the country to wear long hair or beards.

The president said the Education Ministry should be in charge of checking people's hair as the issue was most pressing among the young.

Damn hippies. 'Bout time the government did something about them. And really, what an excellent use of government time, money and resources.

Turkmenistan is ever more cut off from the outside world, and there are few checks and balances against Mr Niyazov's style of government.

On Sunday he is to fire 15,000 nurses and other health workers and replace them with army conscripts.

Oh yeah. I can't see anything going wrong with that.

The Onion on Gay Marriage

On second though, the folks at the Onion have done a much better on the gay marriage issue than I, or most anyone else, could ever hope to do: Massachusetts Supreme Court Orders All Citizens To Gay Marry

Humpty Dumpty

Humpy Dumpty Logic, by Orson Scott Card.

15 February, 2004


Cover of "Dylan"Title: Dylan
Subtitle: A new play by Sidney Michaels

13 February, 2004

Abortion Records

Ashcroft: Abortion Records Needed

"Americans will be shocked to find out that the Bush administration has taken the position that there is no right to medical privacy," Kate Michelman, president of NARAL Pro-Choice America, said in a statement. "To assert that the government has an unfettered right to root around in our private medical records is beyond appalling."

I'm shocked...SHOCKED...to find the Bush administration doing such a thing.

Purity Day

US teens celebrate 'purity day'

High school students are wearing white t-shirts and encourage classmates to remain virgins until they are married.

The conservative US Christian group Liberty Counsel, which organised the day, said US teenagers should make a "public demonstration" of purity.

A public demonstration, huh? Would that involve breaking the hymen and having the blood flow out on the soccer field?

US teenager Melissa Millis, who says she will wear a white t-shirt to promote the Day of Purity at her Michigan state school, told the Associated Press news agency she was tired of feeling pressurised.

''The way sex is talked about, it's so casual, like it's an everyday thing, like going to McDonald's," she said.

"Can I get the number 5, super sized? Oh, and I'll take a handjob from the 99 cent value menu."

12 February, 2004

04 February, 2004

Power to the Working Class

Cover to "Power to the Working Class"Title: Power to the Working Class
Subtitle: Fight for Socialism
Artist: Progressive Labor Party

It's a Match!

According to this Presidential Match Guide (from the nice people at either AOL or CNN...not quite certain), my best candidate matches are:

  1. Kuchinich at 100%
  2. Kerry at 99%
  3. Dean at 98%

Link via The Big Picnic

Too Glamorous?

Glamorous Kidman Stopped 'Cold Mountain' Oscars?

Nicole Kidman's glamorous appearance in American Civil War film Cold Mountain has been blamed for the movie's lack of Oscar success. The Anthony Minghella directed film was hotly tipped for multiple Academy Awards nominations last month - but only managed to pick up one nod in a major category for Jude Law's leading performance. Now a source on the film has revealed "intense debate" occurred in the editing suite over Kidman's flawless appearance as Ada Monroe, and suggests this was ultimately responsible for the movie's disappointing Oscar showing. They say, "During the editing it was obvious that Nicole looked far too glamorous. She was playing a down-trodden farm owner struggling to survive during the American Civil War, yet she looked like a cover girl. There was intense debate involving Anthony and executive producer Harvey Weinstein about digitally smudging Nicole's appearance, roughing up her cheeks, that sort of thing. In the end, time and cost ruled it out. Nicole's appearance dents the credibility of the film and may have cost it Best Picture."

Poor Nicole. Entirely too glamarous and flawless. However does she live with the mental anguish?

No Love From XM

Even with all of their fancy terrestrial repeaters, I still can't get a signal for this XM recevier in my office. *sigh* Stupid government buildings with their stupid signal shielding. If only I could have an office with a window, instead of being stuck in some Inquisition-esque dungeon (except with computers and chairs instead of chains and beatings). More importantly, why is it that so many other people in this building are able to listen to their crappy light jazz and adult contemporary radio stations without the slightest of difficulty, yet I have to go through hoops to circumvent the firewall so I can listen to just a handful of stations via Realaudio?

03 February, 2004

Lord Buckley in Concert

Cover of "Lord Buckley in Concert"Title: Lord Buckley in Concert
Artist: Lord Buckley

02 February, 2004

South American Portugeuse

Cover of "South American Portugeuse"Title: South American Portugeuse
Subtitle: The Living Language Course

01 February, 2004

Peninsula District 8 Regional Band

Cover of "Peninsula District 8 Regional Bands"Title: Peninsula Disctrict VIII 1982 Senior & Junior Regional Bands

Nerd Alert

Engineering geek names son version 2.0

Jon Blake Cusack talked his wife, Jamie, into naming their son Jon Blake Cusack 2.0.

Version 2.0 was born Tuesday at Holland Community Hospital, and the proud parents took him home Friday.

When I first saw the headline, I thought he had literally named his son "Version 2.0". I'm glad at least some decorum won out. However, the article prompted some questions:

  1. Jon Cusack?!
  2. Bwuh?
  3. Did he refer to his child during the gestation phase as a beta version?
  4. If his wife had had an abortion, would the baby have been vaporware?

And I'm sure there are plenty of other pointless, and equally tasteless, questions that could be raised.

Thanks to Jenny for the link