03 March, 2004

Troy

So, if you went to Virginia Tech anytime within the last 15-20 years, you probably know who Troy is. If you don't, then consider yourself lucky. But in the interest of humor, I submit this e-mail sent to me by a co-worker:



Subject:\tRE: Paul is back on the system...

<Entertainment Tonight (ET) Theme Music>
<Pan shot of ET stage moving to a close-up of Mary Hart>
Mary Hart: Hi, welcome to Entertainment Tonight; I'm Mary Hart. Bob Goen is on assisngment. We start tonight with our special correspondant, Troy, in an exclusive interview with Oscar winner Tom Hanks. Troy?
<Shot of Troy sitting in a chair across from Tom Hanks>
<Close-up of Troy just glaring>
<Close-up of Tom Hanks obviously feeling very uncomfortable>
<Close-up of Troy with his right eye twitching>
<Close-up of Tom Hanks sitting with the look of the beginning stages of panic in his eyes>
<Close-up of Troy leaning forward>
Troy: Do you like to watch movies?
<Close-up of Tom Hanks wide eyed and subtly recoiling>
Tom Hanks: Yes....yes I do like to watch movies.
<Pandemonium ensues. The camera is knocked to the ground and the sound of Tom Hanks screaming is the only thing heard, save for incoherent mumblings and gutteral tones>
<Shot of Mary Hart smiling on the stage as though she has no idea what has just happened>
Mary Hart: Thanks Troy. Be sure to join us tomorrow when Troy will be interviewing the band Hanson.

1 comment:

  1. ...who Troy was, actually. He died about 4-5 years ago. How appropriate that the setting for this story is the Entertainment Tonight set. Troy's one of very few people who could out-creepy John Tesh. But yup, he sure did love his movies. I envisioned him living in a one-room efficiency with a TV, a big stack of old 8mm reels, and a bed whose linens would shatter if you tried to fold them.

    Eeeeeeeeuuuuuurgh!

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