20 May, 2004

Mr. Stewart Goes to Williamsburg

John Jon Stewart gives the commencement address at W & M

Please don't be mad. I know we were supposed to bequeath to the next generation a world better than the one we were handed. So, sorry.

I don't know if you've been following the news lately, but it just kinda got away from us. Somewhere between the gold rush of easy internet profits and an arrogant sense of endless empire, we heard kind of a pinging noise, and uh, then the damn thing just died on us. So I apologize.

But here's the good news. You fix this thing, you're the next greatest generation, people. You do this - and I believe you can - you win this war on terror, and Tom Brokaw's kissing your ass from here to Tikrit, let me tell ya. And even if you don't, you're not gonna have much trouble surpassing my generation. If you end up getting your picture taken next to a naked guy pile of enemy prisoners and don't give the thumbs up you've outdid us.

We declared war on terror. We declared war on terror - it's not even a noun, so, good luck. After we defeat it, I'm sure we'll take on that bastard ennui.

Link via Wonkette


  1. Wow, how cool is that? I can't even remember who spoke at my college graduation. I remember who spoke at my high school graduation -- only because he burned up in the Challenger seven months later -- but I can't remember a thing he said.P.S. It's "Jon" Stewart.

  2. hrrm. i believe that the girl who gave the thumbs up next to the pile of prisoners was, actually, the graduates' generation. she was in her very early 20s.